Want a Little Lagerfeld in Your Tea Cup?

Have you ever wanted to have tea with Karl Lagerfeld? Well now you can! Pret-a-porTEA is a kitschy new product that pairs tea with some of the biggest names in fashion.

Karl Lagerfeld

Donatella Versace

I love how the design allows the fashion icon to just hang out in your tea cup. Those outstreached arms make them look like they are in a hot tub hanging out. Hilarious!

Naomi Campbell

This one has Naomi Campbell carrying a cell phone. Double hilarity!

Jean-Paul Gaultier

Pret-a-porTEA Set

Pret-a-porTEA can be found at Fred Flare for $16. Which seems a little high for 5 tea bags, but at least you can say you had tea time with these super stars. Also, a portion of the proceeds are donated to Bethanien-Kinderdoerfer, a German charity that provides assistance for disabled children.

5 Awesomely Bad Holiday Sweaters

The golden years of horrible holiday sweaters may be behind us. The 1980′s were an excellent decade for tacky Christmas wear. Even in the 90′s everyone and their mother (and grandmother) started sporting a holiday sweater the day after Thanksgiving – and it was considered cool. Alas, the holiday sweater has been relegated to hipsters and / or the ironic Holiday Sweater Party.

As a fashion consultant I’m very thankful that stores are carrying fewer Christmas cardigans each year. But, there is a part of me that is quite nostalgic for the joy a really bad sweater can bring. Thus, here’s a look at some awesomely bad sweaters out on the market right now:

#5

Home for the Holidays Sweater form The Tog Shop

(on sale $58.99 – $69.99)

One reason I just LOVE this sweater is that it looks like it came straight out of 1987. My guess is that a few people out there have this exact sweater still in their closets. It includes hand embroidery and gold thread accents – two essential elements of an awesomely awful holiday ensemble.

#4

Quacker Factory Fiber Optic Lighted Holiday Sweater from QVC

(on sale: $32.96)

This holiday sweater bypasses the passe colors of red and green and goes to a dramatic ice blue. It also includes one of the best sweater enhancements ever: fiber optic lights. Amazing. If you are going to go all crazy-holiday-apparel I say go all out. Get the one with the lights.

#3

Sledding Scene Pullover Sweater from CJ Banks

$79.50

The number 3 sweater on our list includes a little bit of everything. Reindeer, snow, a kid sledding down the wearer’s torso, trees, and red doves. The kid riding the sled is wearing a green snow sweater too! A sweater on a sweater = total bonus points.

#2

Christmas Morning Cardigan Sweater from CJ Banks

$89.50

I love this sweater because it tells a story. It’s snowing outside, it’s dark in the house, and presents are waiting by the tree. Santa is even carrying a mesh bag, and there is a cat (?) sitting in the window. Speaking of cats….

#1

Holiday Kitties Novelty Cardigan Sweater by The Country Ewe

$149.99

Kittens love Christmas too! Cats wearing scarves and holiday bows are featured on the front, back, and arms of this sweater. Awesomely bad at its finest!

Do you have a horrible / wonderful holiday sweater in your closet? Any great Christmas sweater stories from the past? Do tell!

These Shoes are Crazycakes

This week I have been doing some research for an upcoming column for the website Sex Really. My fashion investigation led to an interesting discovery – there are lots of crazy shoes out on the market right now! They range from fun to hideous. Here are my top 5:

Iron Fist Turquoise Frankenstein Platform Heel from Hot Topic

Price: $24.74

A closed monster mouth above an open toe. Love it.

Purple Corset Style Lace Up Platform from Electrique Boutique

$61.99

This heel has an 8 inch heel and 4 inch upper platform. And a corset.

Make Way Heel from ModCloth

$239.99

I actually think the right type of fun personality could totally pull off this heel. But, I would like to rename it the, “Girl, Did You Just Walk Through Skittles?” Pump.

UGG Australia Bailey Button Krinkle Boot from Nordstrom

$159.95

There is so much going on with this boot I’m not exactly sure what to say. The bottom part of it looks like a clown shoe. The top of it does look warm, but, then there is a crinkle finish. If you need one other thing to throw into the mix you can order it in purple.

Jeffrey Campbell Mucho Brown Sandal Boot Heel from LuLu’s

$169.00

For the woman who has very cold ankles but very hot toes.

What do you think? Do you like some of these selections? Hate them?

Hilarious Fashion – Urban Outfitters Edition (Bonus! Models Eating!)

I’ve been receiving Urban Outfitters catalogues only for a few months, but I always get such a big kick out of them. I expected hipster clothing, ironic t-shirts, and cute housewares, but what I did not expect was to get a giggle while flipping through the mag.

Case in point – this picture of my Uncle Eddie:

All Images Urban Outfitter's November / December Catalogues.

Okay, it isn’t my Uncle Eddie. But, if this guy was 60 years older he would be the spitting image of Eddie. Crazy hair, disheveled clothes, coming through the door in a confused state where you KNOW some kind of bizarre life situation has contributed to his haphazard appearance.

Then there are these guys, who look like they are acting out a scene from Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby:

Guy 1: I give you one option. As a sign of humility, if you kiss me on the lips now I will return to Paris and you will never see me again in NASCAR.

Guy 2: The answer is never. Do you hear me? Never EVER.

Finally, what is going on with this girl on the far right? Her expression is ha-larious:

"This vest is what?! Faux squirrel fur?"

But, I must give credit to Urban Outfitters for showing something rare – pictures of models eating. When was the last time you opened up a fashion mag or catalogue and saw a woman eating something? It was quite the welcome surprise.

Have you ever thought a company had entertaining catalogues? Do tell!

Kim Kardashian’s W Cover (Or, Girl, where are your clothes?)

So, Kim Kardashian is on the cover of the November issue of W Magazine.

And, she’s in the buff.

I really don’t care one way or the other about Kardashian posing nude. It doesn’t upset me and I don’t have any type of moral dispute with it. But, one reason that I love W is that is is such a beautiful fashion magazine. It’s oversized format makes it perfect for fashion photography. The viewer gets a sense of the drama and beauty of clothing. Its format also allows the audience to see clothing detail that is lost in other publications.

So, when I see a fashion magazine I want to see clothes. And this girl is nekkid. (See previous explanation of the word “nekkid” in this post.) Kardashian talks about her public perception in this issue and how she plays into it – which may be the reason that the editors chose to place her minus clothes on the cover.

W does occasionally push boundaries when it comes to their cover images. Remember when their cover of Angelina Jolie was huge news back in 2008? It was for the November Art Issue as well. I’m just a bit confused about the objective of this particular issue. Is it for shock value? Is it because the female form is utilized in so much within artwork? Is it to try something different? What’s the connection between art, fashion, and a nekkid Kardashian? Any theories out there?

What Old Library Books tell us about Beauty & Style

A friend sent me a link this morning to a fantastic site called Awful Library Books. The site highlights awesomely bad titles that are found in public libraries.

So, today when I was at the library doing a bit of research I couldn’t resist -I had to find out what my local branch had to offer in terms of style, beauty, and fashion books.

It was a-mazing.

Without further ado, here is the best of the worst:

Color for Men by Carole Jackson, Published 1984

Examples of “spring” men. The guy in the top left corner strikes me as especially hilarious. I think he is wearing a Members Only jacket.

Some more “spring” examples. For the top two guys….I just don’t quite know what to say…..

My favorite part of the book had to do with glasses suggestions based on the shape of a man’s face.

Under no circumstances should anyone ever wear these glasses. Unless you are a Hipster and are wearing them ironically. In that case, go forth.

More glasses pics. So 80′s!

Next, Hair Magic by Marion Mathews and Renske Mann, Published 1984.

You KNOW a book is going to be good when it shows a picture of a French Braid on the cover.

Pictures of modern haircuts….

A section on the “Versatility of Hair.” You can wear yours down, or in a side ponytail with a headband!

This is for special events. I can’t tell if they did a French Braid going up and then piled the rest of her hair on top – what do you think?

How to style hair when you wear glasses!

And, because I know everyone will love it, I’m including a bonus recipe found in the back of Hair Magic:

Anti-Dandruff Shampoo

2 egg yolks

12 fl oz warm water

2 tsp. vinegar

Beat the egg yolks into 4 fl oz warm water. Massage the mixture well into the scalp and then leave for about 10 minutes. Rinse with warm water. Add vinegar to 8 fl oz of cool water and use as a rinse. Rinse the hair 2 or 3 times.

Finally, we have a legendary book. The colors book.

Color Me Beautiful by Carole Jackson, Published 1980. (This is the same author as the first book above.)

I didn’t learn about the importance of the Colors Book until I became a Wardrobe Consultant.

I started to work with clients who would tell me all about the colors they could and could not wear. I learned that they were talking about a fad in the 80′s where women would have someone tell them the colors that they looked best in and if they were a Winter, Summer, Autumn, or Spring.

There is truth in what was taught in those color sessions. Certain colors look best on certain skin types. But, what I found is that it also locked women into a particular look for decades.

Again, there are certain things in this book that still hold true. But, the looks are so 80′s! Love it.

The moral of the story here?

Support your local library. This can’t be what is on the shelves for our dear friends / neighbors who are studying about fashion and style!

An Open Letter to United Colors of Benetton

Dear UCOB,

I was taking a stroll in Dupont Circle the other day and came across this advertisement in your store window:

Hmmm...why does it feel drafty?

In case you can’t quite read your ad it states,”The Essentials of Life…Jeans.”

I’m thinking your stylist and or photographer and or marketing department forgot to include something in this picture. Mostly the jeans. Or any other clothing.

Granted, there are many companies that advertise clothing without showing the clothing at all. Or promote jeans with models who are actually wearing the product but nothing on top. These things are all expected after years of flipping through fashion magazines. But, this one made me laugh.

Mostly because that girl is nekkid.

She’s not even naked. I spent a lot of my childhood growing up in the South, and that is what we would call nekkid.

Please get that poor women some clothes. Preferably these elusive jeans you mention.

Thank you,

True to Style